Sunday, March 10, 2013

I Need My House Back........

The girls are still sharing a room and seem to have regressed (both of them) in the last 2 weeks since they have been sharing a room.  This might be a bit of a venting post so click off if you are not wanting to read one of those types of posts. Or you can read through to the bottom where I talk about BGA's violin assembly this week.

We have had some incidents happening over the last week.  LGA climbed up to BGA's Ikea style (different from the one LGA will have in her room) style bed, and wrote in pen on her legs.  BGA and LGA were wearing nighties as the blowers were going and the house was hot.  The weather was low to mid 70's during day and warm in our house from blowers.  So BGA must have been sleeping where LGA could get to her legs and she found a pen (snooping as I knew she would be tempted to) and found a pen.  I told BGA to put her stuff up so LGA couldn't find it, and BGA, being in a mood as her teacher is not in a great mood (probably hating the class that the principal 'specifically brought her from another school to teach" - principal's words back in the fall at back to school night) and she has to share a room with LGA, tried to blame Dave for it.  "Daddy told me to put my pens there."  Uh-huh.  Then some Girl Scout cookie money given by LGA's teacher (who bought 2 boxes from each girl) to BGA, put in her backpack, was taken.  She was upset and thought we'd be upset, but when the teacher came over, she sort of made it sound (or we just thought it was) like it was LGA who had lost it.  So Dave and I, as we picked up BGA (it was on his day off) talk about it and wonder how LGA could have lost it.  BGA does not correct us.  She then continues to let her sister take the fall for it.  I write a note, telling LGA's teacher that LGA has no idea how she lost the money (teacher explains that it is book fair, Girl Scout cookies, fundraisers, etc., and the kids know that there is money in backpacks).  LGA's teacher calls and explains to me that it was BGA who lost money not LGA.  Uh,

There has been fighting, too.  Dave heard a thump in the bathroom one morning and came in to find LGA on top of BGA.  They fight in Dave's car (the van's air conditioning hose needs replacing and no air, yeah, think of me this week when it hits mid to upper 70's and NO AIR and no chance to take van in to get it fixed this week, must get it done on spring break I guess, which is soon) where they have to sit side by side.  They tattle CONSTANTLY on each other. I have tried for years to stop this, but it just won't go away no matter what I try.  BGA is getting really nasty about yelling at LGA as well so I'm trying to stop that one.   BGA yelled out in her sleep one night and both Dave and I thought they were awake, "BE QUIET LGA!  GO TO SLEEP!"  So I came down the hallway and opened the door, both were sound asleep.  They fight before they sleep, but one is on the floor and one is on the bed, so we just let them go till they fall asleep.

We are at the bid stage of getting the flooring done, and are waiting for the construction guy who works for the company that came and put the blowers in to dry out the place, to submit a bid.  He came and pulled up the lino in our bathroom and some carpet.  He said he could get us a better bid than the home improvement store we picked (who did the laminate in our family room while we were in the adoption process but couldn't afford the hallway and living room at that time) to do it.  SO I am waiting on his bid, waited two days for him to send one.  We are leaning towards the home improvement store, but we'll see.  So I await that bid, a friend of mine's fiancee and his brother, to come and put drainage in our backyard because we think this might help with the water and give it a place to drain (the water and soil are eating away at our pipes, and the pipes are exposed, not cased in concrete, etc.).  So that and another home improvement (replacing a door) are being done this week.  I didn't realize, never having had to deal (other than 4 yrs ago) with workers, it's a pain, getting stuff done around your house.  The entire house is torn up, and we have to move and pack stuff to get flooring done, the dust is horrible (from the blowers and ripped up carpet/lino) and LGA and I are having issues. I fully believe I am allergic to dust as it's really been bothering me.  There's no point in dusting as the whole house will be torn up when the rest of the flooring goes, anyway, so I just have to live with it.

But for some reason, having the house torn up is bothering all of us.  And we haven't even gotten to the living room and taking everything out of it, but hopefully that will be done when the girls are at school. Home Improvement store told us the laminate has to cure in our house for 3 days too.  We are also running out of time as my friend from the very north of northern CA is coming to visit us for 5 days in two weeks.  Can we do it??? I don't know but if she's here, I am enlisting her help, LOL.  She needs a place to sleep as well and our Ikea couches are barely comfortable to sleep on (and I know as I slept on them when the blowers were going as my bedroom felt like a sauna).  She's slept on air mattresses before.  But now both girls will have loft beds.  So I'm trying to convince Dave to put the mattress and box spring (which he can't get to in the garage till he takes boxes to the dump) in LGA's room till my friend leaves so she can sleep on a twin bed with box spring and mattress (at the time I made the offer, which is why she accepted in the first place, I thought LGA was just getting the twin bed back). She says she's game to sleep on an air mattress, but I don't know how well that will work.  I'm wishing we'd invested in a sleeper sofa as we really have no room now for any guests (not that we ever have any, anymore).

I have known that the girls have an issue with any type of transition, but it evidently includes the home not being quite right.  So of course, we are adjusting to what 4 yrs ago, took about a week to fix, to what 4 yrs later and new flooring, is taking 2 weeks + to fix.  I know it all goes back to their past issues, it's just hard sometimes when I have to make other decisions and take the lead on this (Dave clearly demonstrated he did not want to handle it and that it upset him thinking about it) and deal with kids who have issues with transition, that spills out into their life.  Funnily enough, after one or two small issues at school (where she had a sub right when she was first sleeping in BGA's room and my trip to LA) LGA is doing well in school and I think her teacher is helping her. It's nice for her to have a teacher this year who helps with her issues and totally gets her.

BGA is doing well and her teacher sent home a kudos note telling us how well she did on Friday.  Good job BGA!.  Also her first violin performance assembly is this week. I am excited to see her perform (even though she has had no home practice as her violin got stolen at school...........did I mention that?? If I'm repeating myself I apologize as I am too lazy to go look it up). She is starting to shine, and it's nice to see that.   She has continued the eye rolling and sighing (that she started at 10, so watch out mamas of kids who haven't reached 10 yet) and now she's added muttering under her breath and blaming others (so we are again working on taking personal responsibility for your actions).

We visited my friend's ranch today, we had not seen them for awhile and the girls missed them.  They have goats, chickens and bunnies.  They also have a huge tire swing and a small cart the girls got to drive.  They had fun.  I observed them while talking to my friend, and both girls are really growing up.  I need a smaller purse style camera to carry with me, I realized I have not taken any camera pictures (other than my phone) for over a year.  Shame on me! I think the last camera pics I downloaded were from xmas 2011! So  I need to carry a camera in my purse that I can whip out and shoot with. Especially as we have a great summer going, I think, so far.  The girls will be in cousin G's wedding, as flower girls in the early fall, and I plan on getting them involved in some summer activities and even maybe a short trip to see my high school friends for a beach trip and hotel stay (if it works out).  I think it will be good for us, although traveling is not always a piece of cake for the girls, but I am willing to take them on a girl's trip.

So, if you got this far, we're doing ok but we need the house back.  Spring is coming, I feel the warmth coming, put all the sweaters away in storage (yes, I have the smallest closet, 2nd to smallest, that I have ever put my clothes in) on Friday and a couple I didn't get to wear but really liked. They'll be there when fall rolls around.   Hopefully spring brings the promise of what is to come.  Short sleeved tops, capris, flip flops, etc., it's that promise of warm weather, but not the heat of summer.

Here's to hoping the house gets put back together so the girls can get back to their normal routine.

EDITED to ADD: I took a paragraph out of the original post.  I wrote it at 3:30 or so this am. I had a hard time sleeping last night and Dave and I worked all day on our bedroom, purging stuff and getting ready so we can move furniture out for the carpet. It's nice doing it together though, and we had the girls do some chores and busy stuff for us today too.  So excuse my 3am rant.  It's just hard having the house torn up and I realize how much my kids need normalcy.

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